Self-Objectification Often Rooted in Poor Father-Daughter Relationships

I met a woman recently at the bar where I work. I couldn’t help checking her out when she walked through the door – bare breasts except for sequined pasties, shorts revealing cheeks hanging out, and over-the-top makeup with sparkly eye shadow and inch-long eyelashes. She was going to the Lost Lands Music Festival, an electronic music extravaganza that recently came to Legend Valley. And she was absolutely beautiful, but somehow I got the sense that this kind of dressing up wasn’t just for the occasion. Where was this woman’s father? If he was an influence in her life would she have been there self-objectifying herself? I sometimes see women do this and it makes me wonder why they would present themselves, share themselves, give themselves away like this. It’s because of a constant quest to find love. I’ve been one of these women myself. I grew up without my biological father around and it shaped so much of me, and sometimes the need for validation still remains, even at my age.

The concept of objectification is often associated with the way women are portrayed in the media and society. But it’s also true that objectification can also occur from within, fueled by individual experiences and psychological aspects. It’s been suggested that poor father-daughter relationships are one aspect of why women self-objectify themselves.

Research suggests that the quality of one’s relationship with their father during childhood and adolescence can significantly impact various aspects of a woman’s development, including her self-esteem, body image, and self-worth. Positive father-daughter relationships that foster trust, emotional support, and validation generally provide a solid foundation for healthy self-perception. But strained or absent relationships may contribute to the development of father issues that can manifest in different ways. It’s even laughed at often and joked about. “That woman has serious daddy issues.” Self-objectification occurs when individuals internalize societal norms, constantly viewing themselves as objects to be evaluated against predefined beauty standards. For women with father issues, self-objectification can function as a coping mechanism, allowing them to seek external validation and fill the void left by an emotional or absent father figure. By objectifying themselves, these women may believe they can gain a sense of control and approval from others, compensating for the lack of love they may have received in their father-daughter relationship. The media and societal pressures certainly don’t help and only in exacerbate self-objectification. Media platforms often portray narrow and unrealistic standards of beauty, promoting the idea that a woman’s value lies in her physical attributes. Seeing all of these images, women internalize these messages, further fueling their self-objectification as they compare themselves to socially constructed ideals. With social media today, arguably we can all see how much worse it is for young women having to deal with all of these messages compared to past decades. I’m not well read on St. John Paul II’s theology of the body, but I know the gist of some of it. It’s worth pointing out to young women that he acknowledges the topic of self-objectification in relation to father issues. John Paul II’s teachings emphasize the inherent dignity and value of the human person, including the body, which is seen as a sacred vessel of the soul. Yet, many of our young women are giving all of themselves away. According to this theology, a healthy understanding of the human body is rooted in love, self-giving, and authentic relationships. In this context, the father-daughter relationship holds immense significance. A caring and nurturing father figure can provide a crucial source of love and affirmation for a woman. The absence or dysfunction of such a relationship can disrupt her ability to recognize and appreciate her intrinsic dignity. When father issues are present, women may struggle to perceive their bodies as temples of the Holy Spirit, focusing instead on external appearances and objectifying themselves. Theology of the body teaches that true fulfillment comes when individuals respect and honor their own bodies, recognizing their unique purpose beyond merely physical attractiveness.

John Paul II’s teachings encourage individuals to combat self-objectification by cultivating healthy relationships based on respect, love, and authentic communication. This includes seeking healing and reconciliation in father-daughter relationships, allowing women to overcome the wounds that may be contributing to their self-objectification tendencies.

Some women may never have the opportunity to make things right with their fathers. To those struggling with this, I hope this introduction to the idea at least plants a seed. GOD is your father, and all you need to thrive.