Stick to Your Goals and See Real Change
“New year, new me.” Sound familiar? It’s flooded every Instagram post for the past month. Every January 1st, millions of people decide it’s time to make a change — whether it’s eating healthier, working out, or cutting back on screen time. But here’s the catch: 80% of these resolutions have been abandoned already. That means out of every 100 people, only 8 have actually stuck to their goals. Crazy, right?
It’s not about having better gym equipment or more free time. It’s about exercising discipline and commitment. The 8% succeed because they rely on the CARDINAL VIRTUES. The first is prudence, the ability to discern the good and choose the right means to achieve it. In simpler terms, prudence is the ability to do the right thing, at the right time, in the right way. The second virtue is justice, giving others what they are due. The third virtue is fortitude, the courage to face difficulties and persevere in the pursuit of good. The final virtue is temperance, moderation in what we do or buy or consume.
In my opinion, those who finish what they start, exercise the virtues of fortitude and temperance. Exercising fortitude looks like waking up and getting out of bed when your alarm clock goes off even though you’re exhausted. It looks like going to the gym even though your legs are so sore from the day before. Fortitude is the ability to continue to do what you set out to do in the first place.
Temperance is the ability to set oneself up for success. Temperance exercises the ability to say no to some things so that later on you can say yes to better things. Temperance is closing your laptop at 11 p.m. so that you can be fully rested for the day ahead. Temperance is not having that second serving of ice cream. But, temperance isn’t just about saying no. It can also look like, I can buy that item at the store because I had saved enough this month. Temperance is staying within your budget so that when your friend asks you to go out to dinner, you can afford it because you didn’t spend extra money on something that you didn’t really need.
In summary, exercising virtue isn’t going to make your life bland and boring, but rather, it gives you guidelines to follow so that you can live your life and live it to the fullest. So how do we make it to the end of the year so that we’re in the top 8%? We start small. Let’s say that our goal is to “get in shape.” What does that even mean? What kind of shape are we talking about? Olympic athlete, all-state champion? You get the point.
Step #1 is to make your goals more specific. “I want to live a healthier life.” That’s a great alternative. In addition, research has shown that when you have a theme for the year, it’s easier to obtain because the small things you do can fall under that theme. So let’s say this year’s theme is health.
Step #2 is to make it timely. If you’re going to focus on running, for example, your goal might be, “I want to be able to run a mile without stopping by springtime.” Then as you achieve each goal, you can bump up the next goal. Maybe your goal is to stop eating out. “I will let myself eat out once a week for a month.” Next month, you can change it to eating out once every other week. Soon, you’ll find yourself inching closer and closer to your goal.
Step #3 is to tie this goal to an action. “I am going to start running at my local gym.” Or, “I’m going to go for a run and listen to that new podcast I’ve been waiting to listen to.” There’s a win-win in that; you run and you get to listen to your podcast.
Step #4 is to make your goal attainable. While some people can start habits by going all in, more often than not, you need to ease your way into things. If you don’t work out, don’t expect to work out for an hour every day. Make it manageable. “I’m going to work out 3 days a week for at least 30 minutes.” Start slow and know your limits. Start slow and set realistic expectations. Knowing your limits doesn’t make you weak — it makes you smart.
Feel like you got a good idea? Go ahead and write yours down. The truth is that it’s never too late to start and today is the best day to begin. Don’t think in terms of tomorrow when it comes to building a new habit. Start thinking in terms of Day #1. But the truth is, you’re going to mess up. You’ll miss a day of working out or whatever your plan is. Realize that you’re not perfect and that’s okay. But don’t let that get you down. Think about it this way: if you forgot to brush your teeth one day, would you wake up the next and say, “Well I didn’t brush my teeth yesterday, that stinks. I guess I won’t brush them today or ever again.” No! That’s one, gross, and two, so silly.
Let this year be new for you, with a new mindset, and a new outlook on life. Life is going to be a challenge so make it a game. Make it fun and don’t give up. You’ll see the change happen over time!
